Things You Just Shouldn't Say

This post is specifically for my readers who DO NOT have depression.

There are some things you just shouldn't say to someone who is depressed. When you say these things it's like a slap across the face. And honestly we kind of just want to strangle you when you say it. It also makes us feel guilty for feeling depressed. Depression is not something we have control over. If you can remember that they everything else will be fine. Here is a list of things you really just should not say to us:

Snap out of it

There are a lot of people worse off than you

You have so many things to be thankful for, how can you be depressed?

You’d feel better if you got off all those pills

What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger

Go out and have some fun

I know how you feel

So you’re depressed, aren’t you always?

This too shall pass

We all have our crosses to bear

We create our own reality.
You’ll feel better tomorrow.Life isn’t fair.
You just have to deal with it.
Life goes on.
You’re being selfish.
You’re bringing me down.
What do you even have to be depressed about?
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Why these are stupid things to say...

Any of those statements shows that you have no idea what you’re talking about. You fundamentally do not understand the concept of a mental illness if you think any one of these are appropriate. I suggest trying it with other physical health problems and see how you feel:

Hey, diabetic, snap out of it.
Hey, epileptic, I know how you feel.
Hey, paraplegic, so you can’t use your legs, isn’t that always the case?
Hey, person with multiple sclerosis, we create our own reality.

You get the idea. No one would think that is reasonable, and it’s no more reasonable just because you can’t see the illness because it’s in my brain.

These are hurtful things to say, and perhaps worse than showing ignorance, these things can even inflict pain on the person you're trying to "help". You are saying that:

They could choose not to be sick if they really wanted

Their illness is not serious

They have no "reason" to be ill 

Their treatment is wrong

They’ll be better off from it

They would be fine if they would just “go out”

Their illness is minimal

Their pain doesn’t matter

They should just wait for the pain to end

Their illness is just like anyone else’s problem

They choose to be sick

Again, I dare you to tell a person with any other illness any of those things.

And lest we forget, the mentally ill person in front of you is already probably feeling very bad abouyt themselves, and you have chosen to go and make it worse.

Lets not forget, people die from mental illnesses. The idea that mental illnesses is serious isn't something that I made up, it is a fact. Please check out my post titled "Suicide". This is serious stuff people. It is not a runny nose. Basically what I'm trying to get at is that the things you say affect us more than the average person. When it comes to suicide most people commit it because of the things people say and the things they either do or don't do. Words hurt and for some kill us. I know that sounds sill but it is so very true. I hope that this helps you understand that fact, and I know that being friends/family with someone with depression is super hard but know that we appreciate it even if way may not say it or show it.

(here are the sites I got a lot of my information from http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/breakingbipolar/2010/09/stop-minimizing-mental-illness-worst-things-to-say/

http://www.buzzfeed.com/laraparker/things-you-shouldnt-say-to-someone-struggling-with-depress#.mlDn7918Eq  )